Current:Home > NewsRebel Wilson lost her virginity at 35. That's nothing to be ashamed about. -ValueMetric
Rebel Wilson lost her virginity at 35. That's nothing to be ashamed about.
View
Date:2025-04-27 15:58:04
Rebel Wilson lost her virginity at 35 years old.
"People can wait till they're ready or wait till they're a bit more mature," Wilson told People ahead of the release of her new memoir "Rebel Rising." "And I think that could be a positive message. You obviously don't have to wait until you're in your thirties like me, but you shouldn't feel pressure as a young person."
For years, movies and TV shows have portrayed abstinent characters as strange, brainwashed, uptight or naïve (Look to Steve Carell's character Andy in "The 40 Year Old Virgin," who is mercilessly mocked by his peers). A 2016 study also found that people who are sexually inexperienced were perceived by potential partners as "flawed" in the dating market.
But many sex experts don't see it this way. In reality, choosing boundaries can be empowering for those who want to exhibit agency over their bodies and relationships. "There's just as much power in saying no as yes," Amanda McCracken, a sexual empowerment advocate and writer, previously told USA TODAY.
Each person's relationship and sexual journey is different, so there is no need to stress if Wilson's story sounds familiar.
Are people having less casual sex? Staying single longer?
Today’s young people are swiping left on the idea of casual sex.
In 2021, research from Rutgers University-New Brunswick showed that casual sex has steadily decreased in recent years. Though many would suspect this was due to the pandemic, the trend actually pre-dates quarantines and shutdowns.
As a sex researcher, Candice Hargons previously told USA TODAY there are many known benefits of a healthy sex life. But saying no can also offer similar perks. Some may opt for abstinence because they're fed up with hookup culture and crave an emotional connection. Others may use the opportunity for mindfulness and reflection.
Wilson recalled, "Normally I would just leave the room when the conversation (about virginity) was happening. And then the people that said, 'Oh, at 24, it's so late.' And then I'm sitting here thinking, 'Oh my God, my number's 35. What the hell? I'm going to look like the biggest loser.'"
Some recent statistics indicate that lifelong romantic relationships may not be forming as quickly for young people as they did in decades past.
"Overall, we’ve seen a shift in our culture that began occurring as millennials reached adulthood," says Moe Ari Brown, a licensed marriage and family therapist. "We are no longer marrying as young as our parents did."
The median age to get married for the first time in 2022 was 30.1 for men and 28.2 for women, according to U.S. Census Bureau estimates. In 1990, the median age for a man was 26.1 and a woman 23.9.
"This means that having your first romantic relationship might also happen later than in previous generations," Brown adds. "This is good news for anyone who feels like they are the only one who isn’t partnered."
A return to chastity?Why so many women are saying no to casual sex.
Why people might not enter romantic, sexual relationships
People are staying in school longer, are more keen on exploring their LGBTQ identities and are questioning traditional relationship institutions, Brown says.
Wilson, now engaged to designer Ramona Agruma, noted she "would've explored her sexuality more" had she "been born 20 years later."
Seeking professional help might be beneficial if fear of romantic relationships is the reason why someone finds they are remaining single.
"If someone is worried and finds social interactions awkward or uncomfortable there are coaches and therapists who can help employ exercises," says Courtney Watson, licensed marriage and family therapist. "If the difficulty is related to unresolved traumas then again, therapy is a great tool."
Important:Voluntary celibacy and the sexual empowerment of saying 'no'
What to do if you've never been in a relationship, had sex
- Remember it's not just you. "Many people have not had their first long-term romantic relationships, and it’s OK not to partner until you are ready," Brown says.
- Take time to get to know yourself. "Self-exploration can assist you in defining what feels best for you so that you can identify when you’ve made a solid match in a partner," Brown adds.
- Figure out what you want. Is a relationship something you actually desire, or something you think you should desire?
- Prepare to be vulnerable. "You might have to be ready to step out of your comfort zone and engage with others or apps In ways you have previously avoided to see what works for you," Watson adds.
- Stick to your boundaries. Don't change to fit into what you think someone else wants.
- Avoid comparisons. "You’re never too fast, and you’re never too slow," Brown says. "Think of yourself as right on time for your life's epic adventure. Things will unfold for you, and it’ll be well worth the wait when they do."
Contributing: Jenna Ryu and Laura Berman
veryGood! (98696)
Related
- Trump wants to turn the clock on daylight saving time
- Northern California battered by blizzard, Sierra Nevada residents dig out: See photos
- 2024 Masters Tournament: Who will participate at Augusta? How to watch, odds, TV schedule
- Jake Paul vs. Ryan Bourland live updates: How to watch, stream Jake Paul fight card
- Working Well: When holidays present rude customers, taking breaks and the high road preserve peace
- U.S. official says there's a deal on the table for a proposed cease-fire, hostage release deal with Hamas
- Firefighters face tough weather conditions battling largest wildfire in Texas history that has left 2 dead
- Immigration ‘parole’ is a well-worn tool for US presidents. It faces a big test in 2024 elections
- Former longtime South Carolina congressman John Spratt dies at 82
- Malaysia may renew hunt for missing flight MH370, 10 years after its disappearance
Ranking
- What were Tom Selleck's juicy final 'Blue Bloods' words in Reagan family
- Organization & Storage Solutions That Are So Much Better Than Shoving Everything In Your Entryway Closet
- Trump escalates his immigration rhetoric with baseless claim about Biden trying to overthrow the US
- IRS special agent accused of involuntary manslaughter in shooting of fellow employee at gun range
- Appeals court scraps Nasdaq boardroom diversity rules in latest DEI setback
- Blizzard hits California and Nevada, shutting interstate and leaving thousands without power
- Inside the story of the notorious Menendez brothers case
- Mega Millions winning numbers for March 1 drawing as jackpot passes $600 million
Recommendation
US appeals court rejects Nasdaq’s diversity rules for company boards
Iowa Democrats were forced to toss the caucus. They’ll quietly pick a 2024 nominee by mail instead
No twerking. No drinking. No smoking. But plenty of room for Jesus at this Christian nightclub
Michigan football helped make 'Ravens defense' hot commodity. It's spreading elsewhere.
The 401(k) millionaires club keeps growing. We'll tell you how to join.
North Carolina is among GOP states to change its voting rules. The primary will be a test
Caitlin Clark makes 2 free throws to break Pete Maravich’s NCAA Division I scoring record
Organization & Storage Solutions That Are So Much Better Than Shoving Everything In Your Entryway Closet